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Monday, September 11, 2006
here we go
I don't have an interesting story about Sept 11th, I'm not going to tell you about what class I was in or what the teacher said. Expirience isn't something I have to give, so what I will talk about in today's post is what ran through my head when the implications began to sink in.
Where my emotional memory kicks in that day, I was watching CNN with my step sister, and talking to my mom over the phone. She was still at work, and I had just got home from school so I didn't know much of what happened. CNN had taken to replaying the videos (you know the ones) over and over again, and on a large screen TV, without 20 other kids crowded around, I froze with the image stuck in my brain. This is the moment I knew that this was a big deal, not because someone told me it was, but because a tingling in my gut projected to me a chain, of which this was just one link. Whether or not this moment did force me to grow up a little bit or not, it sure feels that way thinking back. One minute I was asking my mom why she didn't come pick me up from school, then after a pause I said:
"This is going to start a war isn't it mom?"
She said yes.
"This war is going to be the big war, isn't it?" You know... the BIG war.
She said, "You know what Honey? In effect, this is just another catalyst. It isn't the final straw, but it does mean we're getting there." something about there anyway. And it calmed me. I wasn't afraid, I wasn't paniky and glued to CNN. I just sort of knew that the event, and ones proceeding it, would/have occured for a reason. So I'm going to say that 9/11 had a sombering effect on me, as it did in the long run, on all of us I think.
Now I hope I don't have to talk about that for a very very long time. This is why I didn't want to go see those movies, nor can I watch the previews. Hurts to bring this up. I wont pay 7 bucks to relive it, thanks.
Technorati Tags: 9/11, war, memories, terrorism, fear